The revealing of truth to the heart is an amazing thing. Truth has always been truth. It is like an atom. It cannot be made or destroyed...just revealed. I have phrased things, "I have discovered...," but I have been given clarity. I have no power over the truth, but it has significant power over me. The power to break and heal, bring sorrow and joy, repentance and grace. Truth can be ugly and beautiful, but I cannot argue with the simple fact that it will set me free from the lies that are screamed in my face. Lies that bring self-doubt and the lies that bring pride, lies that cause my reality to look beautiful when I need to look at the ugly, and the lies that shadow beauty with evil.
I lean from side to side. It would almost seem less ugly if I leaned towards self-doubt more than pride, but that makes me roll my eyes at myself. Who am I kidding? I am equally prideful and full of self-doubt. Both keep me locked in a cage. I want to let the truth scream louder to my soul than the lies that have infected me,* left me swollen with ugliness. Infected...I am such a visual person, and this is a nasty thing I see. I want the infection out! I want to be healthy and whole...at least I want that most days...or maybe the truth is, not very many days do I feel like facing these lies that haunt me because it will hurt to have the infection removed, lanced, cleansed, the dead cut away.
The process to replace one lie with truth, point by point, pen to paper, words from mouth...it feels long, but allowing myself to be drug through the mud of ugly lies...that is exhausting, unsure. I want to have the courage to acknowledge the truth more and more each day, to live the way I was designed to live, to feel the cool green grass of truth more often as I walk this journey. If I face the lies, turn and look at them in the eye, examine them, compare them to what HE says about me, and if I choose for a split second to believe, one more flaming arrow will be quenched, one less weapon formed against me will prosper.
Moment by moment...freedom will fill my heart.
Less oozing lies, more fresh clean truth.
Step-by-step closer to being fully alive.
*“We're going to have to let truth scream louder to our souls than the lies that have infected us.”
― Beth Moore, So Long, Insecurity: You've Been a Bad Friend to Us
John 3:9-21 (Messaga) "This is the crisis we're in: God-light streamed into the world, but men and women everywhere ran for the darkness. They went for the darkness because they were not really interested in pleasing God. Everyone who makes a practice of doing evil, addicted to denial and illusion, hates God-light and won't come near it, fearing a painful exposure. But anyone working and living in truth and reality welcomes God-light so the work can be seen for the God-work it is."
John 8:31-32 (Message) Then Jesus turned to the Jews who had claimed to believe in him. "If you stick with this, living out what I tell you, you are my disciples for sure. Then you will experience for yourselves the truth, and the truth will free you."